Beards. There’s no getting around them. They’re pretty much the most manly thing you can have, if you’re a man. Come to think of it it’s the most manly thing you can have if you’re a woman, too.


They are big and hair and powerful and make you look at least 20,0005.3a% more manly and they also allow you to lift much heavier weights and do two armbars at the same time. Possibly even a toe hold too, although toe holds are slightly less manly than armbars.


Beards also add 25% choke resistance – most people will be grossed out by the thick, slightly pungent facial hairs getting tangled up in their girlish nails as they try (feebly) to choke you (as if).



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